So yday was more veg dominated and today was fruit dominated with a tiny portion of veg! feeling alot better! no longer cramming food into my system! Im now actually enjoying what Im eating and trying to eat as slowly as possible.
Got a few things today shopping! so happy happy! going out 2nite so getting ready now I fill u in more on my spree 2mro bc it was a gud one! x
Saturday, 13 June 2009
Friday, 12 June 2009
Valium yum
So today is the first day in ages! that I have restricted the quantities of what I eat even tho I eat mega healthily. But today Im not eating any soya yogirhurts since I ate 3 yesterday and Im not eating any beans either. Ive eaten a stick of celery an orange and I might have a mini veg stir fry with spinach, mushrooms, pepper and courgettes cooked in soya sauce and juice of a fresh lemon and garlic to speed up the metabolism.
So now of course my mind is all like ok this means everyday you can have one fruit and a veg stir fry. Why is it so hard to listen to what it wants. I always have to go off and make up these rules that never revolve around how by body feels. I actually eat so much fruit and veg bc its a safe food and I fill myself with it even if I feel sick. Its not very good. My minds a tad crazy. I bullshitted to da doctor yday and got myself a pack of valium mmmmmmm.........
so the plan is to take loads and knock myself out and wake up thin haha!
So now of course my mind is all like ok this means everyday you can have one fruit and a veg stir fry. Why is it so hard to listen to what it wants. I always have to go off and make up these rules that never revolve around how by body feels. I actually eat so much fruit and veg bc its a safe food and I fill myself with it even if I feel sick. Its not very good. My minds a tad crazy. I bullshitted to da doctor yday and got myself a pack of valium mmmmmmm.........
so the plan is to take loads and knock myself out and wake up thin haha!
Thursday, 11 June 2009
3 yoghurts!
Well bc my scheduele is totally fucked up now bc I had to get up at 8.20! so it meant I ate soooooooo much bc the day was so much longer. I had 3 yoghurts! alpro soya organic! eek! o well what can you do I was bound to binge sooner or later. Its awful I swear I can feel my thighs getting fatter. Well fuck it I dont give a shit. 2mro I am not having kidney beans or yoghurts. Lots of tea is my plan but I dont no fully how da eating will go yet. I don have ne food in my house. I wna just do tea till wednesday but I dont think it will work but I want it to bc then I will have dropped something b4 I go home on wednesday. Ill try to do it. If Im hungry I can eat celery x
Wednesday, 10 June 2009
Spam Blog
Whats da deal? Im being reviewed for having a spam blog? what da hell is that! anyway dont think anyone is actually reading this anymore and I dont blame anyone bc my life fuckin sucks and nothing is changing no matter how hard I try! I cnt deal with all the shit in my life anymore. even tho theres not alot the injury and eating thing is enough. I dont wna eat in a resteraunt later I hate it. I couldnt sleep last night thinking about it. How weird am I gonna look eating a side salad! haha! o Im just a fucking joke. Once again my only lesson in college was cancelled! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
going to meditaion on friday!
going to meditaion on friday!
Tuesday, 9 June 2009
Anti-depressants
So I was gonna get up go to my doctor and bullshit my way into getting some anti depressants. but in fairness I dont think I would of had to bullshit that much bc my life sucks right now. Anyway theres no way Ill get an appointment for today and plus I just did some research and they can cause weight gain?! so fuck that! Valium better not cause weight gain bc sometimes I take that but my doctor is so stingy with the prescription! In bed now. I have a class at 4.30 that I can take part in so Im probly gonna go get some fruit b4 den but stay in bed all day and then as soon as I come home. Ugh need to do my abs ass and arms!? stress of my life!
Monday, 8 June 2009
kill me now
..........
K I think Im becoming depressed. Its not over eating its over my injury. I dont knoww how my eating went today. I got up had my yoghurt and hemp protein and seeds. then didnt eat for ages then got a good bit of fruit but only had one box of grapes which is good but I wasnt satified. Got some watermelon which I love but it was cut into tiny little pieces! whatever! had my dinner which I love and now Im about to have my laxee tee. Only one left after this one.
I feel like my life is going nowhere. Like this blog has represented what like the last 3 weeks of my life and nothing has changed. Hopefully my arms will start to tone up bc Ive been doing lots of exercises but I really need to do cardio once my foot gets sorted. Im going to get a massage on wednesday! I need one. I actually dont no whats going on with me right now. Maybe its bc Im on my period which Im n ot used to being on but I feel all over the place. My mom is really supportive but shes really pushing me to have a plan B incase I dont recover properly and cant dance next yr! Id actually rather die and start life over again then considor that. I dont want my parents to know how upset I am over here at moment but I am. Im considoring going on anti depressants 2mro altho I dont know if that will help anything. I have an addictive personality. hence why I obsess over things.
Its my friends birthday on wednesday and wer going to Frankie and Bennies. I dont know what to order. Either a side salad or fries and not eat them! mmm Im gonna push da omg my money hasnt gone into my account excuse haha! I hate spending money on food ewwww.
Im loving adding frozen spinach to my little veggie stir fries so good with garlic and lemin. I used to always add dolmio bolegnase light sauces but who needs da extra calories! Im enjoying being a vegan. And I definelty havent been as bloated. I think this summer when I go home Im going to try having 6 small meals a day. Im also gonna be doing a 30 day course of brikram yoga. You do a class a day for 90 mins. Its so intense but its so good for u. Also gonna try go swimming regularily.
No luck finding jobs today. Whatever dont even no if I care. The only place I actually would of liked to work was da pet store bc I love animals! Id really love the company of one now. Just to sit around da house with.
Question
Is it better to eat alpro soya yoghurts as opposed to muller light yoghurts?!
Alpro soya organic- calium, live in cultures, low in saturated fat, amino acids, omega 6&3, no artificial additives
98 kcal
11.9 sugar
2.8 Fat
0.5 saturates
0.2 salt
Muller Ligthts- virutally fat free with sugar and sweeteners.
100 kcal
12.4 sugars
Theres barely any fat or saturated altho theres is carbs! mmmm..
I dont no why Im doing this! I once loved these yoghurts so much! binged on 5 one time then vowed never to eat them again! but now Im over them even though I dont think the alpro ones are as nice I feel better for eating them.
K I think Im becoming depressed. Its not over eating its over my injury. I dont knoww how my eating went today. I got up had my yoghurt and hemp protein and seeds. then didnt eat for ages then got a good bit of fruit but only had one box of grapes which is good but I wasnt satified. Got some watermelon which I love but it was cut into tiny little pieces! whatever! had my dinner which I love and now Im about to have my laxee tee. Only one left after this one.
I feel like my life is going nowhere. Like this blog has represented what like the last 3 weeks of my life and nothing has changed. Hopefully my arms will start to tone up bc Ive been doing lots of exercises but I really need to do cardio once my foot gets sorted. Im going to get a massage on wednesday! I need one. I actually dont no whats going on with me right now. Maybe its bc Im on my period which Im n ot used to being on but I feel all over the place. My mom is really supportive but shes really pushing me to have a plan B incase I dont recover properly and cant dance next yr! Id actually rather die and start life over again then considor that. I dont want my parents to know how upset I am over here at moment but I am. Im considoring going on anti depressants 2mro altho I dont know if that will help anything. I have an addictive personality. hence why I obsess over things.
Its my friends birthday on wednesday and wer going to Frankie and Bennies. I dont know what to order. Either a side salad or fries and not eat them! mmm Im gonna push da omg my money hasnt gone into my account excuse haha! I hate spending money on food ewwww.
Im loving adding frozen spinach to my little veggie stir fries so good with garlic and lemin. I used to always add dolmio bolegnase light sauces but who needs da extra calories! Im enjoying being a vegan. And I definelty havent been as bloated. I think this summer when I go home Im going to try having 6 small meals a day. Im also gonna be doing a 30 day course of brikram yoga. You do a class a day for 90 mins. Its so intense but its so good for u. Also gonna try go swimming regularily.
No luck finding jobs today. Whatever dont even no if I care. The only place I actually would of liked to work was da pet store bc I love animals! Id really love the company of one now. Just to sit around da house with.
Question
Is it better to eat alpro soya yoghurts as opposed to muller light yoghurts?!
Alpro soya organic- calium, live in cultures, low in saturated fat, amino acids, omega 6&3, no artificial additives
98 kcal
11.9 sugar
2.8 Fat
0.5 saturates
0.2 salt
Muller Ligthts- virutally fat free with sugar and sweeteners.
100 kcal
12.4 sugars
Theres barely any fat or saturated altho theres is carbs! mmmm..
I dont no why Im doing this! I once loved these yoghurts so much! binged on 5 one time then vowed never to eat them again! but now Im over them even though I dont think the alpro ones are as nice I feel better for eating them.
Whatever
I hate my life.
maybe a tad dramatic but I am so bored of being injured! If there was anyway I could move on with my life I would. I wanna go home and be with my friends. Not in a different country where every1 I know is at college 24/7! I am so going to hand out my cv's! even tho Im only here for another 5 weeks I need to do something!!!!
Next week Im allowed t gradually start exericising again so Im thinking 45 mins cross trainer and weights session and a nice stretch! awwwwww sounds amazing!
maybe a tad dramatic but I am so bored of being injured! If there was anyway I could move on with my life I would. I wanna go home and be with my friends. Not in a different country where every1 I know is at college 24/7! I am so going to hand out my cv's! even tho Im only here for another 5 weeks I need to do something!!!!
Next week Im allowed t gradually start exericising again so Im thinking 45 mins cross trainer and weights session and a nice stretch! awwwwww sounds amazing!
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