so last nite I kind of deflated which was surprising considoring I didnt no.2! but anyway Im not complaining! now today I have feckin diareah! my body is sooo messed up haha! I finished da watermelon this morning adn had a tin of kidneys beans with salad! and its only 10 past 2! I cleaned the house for an hour. Ive to get a bus into towna nd then another bus sumwhere else to get mri scans 2day and Im going to cinema straight after and then 2mro Im going to the airport so Im feeling a little frazzled! mmm what to do. like Ive eaten todays intake already! unless I pick up more watermelon?? that is a possibility Im not gna lie. den I can have that 2mro b4 I fly.......
anyway I think Ill do body conditioning while I watch desperate housewives and then I need to pack my bag! ahhh I hate getting public transport Id drive but its too far away and Im not licensed! haha! o fuck!!!
Im gna c bruno later yeh! sry lack of news! I tried to get with a guy who was so not amazingly hot but he was totally wasted I was pissed!
I decided Im gna have a one nite stand very soon......ne advice?!
xx
o btw my friend is really thin like shes a size 6/8 and I think shes smaller then me and I told her I got a dress and she has to borrow it for this party Im having and she was like wow what size is it am I goin to have to starve myself to fit into it?! I was like what yur thinner then me! I always say how unfair it is that u and ur sister are naturally thin! and she was like Lexy ur way thinner!
yeh!
and then this morning I was like o my stomach is going crazy and she was like maybe u shud eat sumtin?!
maybe I am thinner then I think. I dont wna weigh myself tho numbers scare me and I n o Ill get obsessed. plus my moms hidden the scales teehee!
xx
Friday, 10 July 2009
Thursday, 9 July 2009
Today!
Thank god yday is over. I went on a bit of a fruit binge and then had a veg stir fry! y all bc Im an idiot! I was driving to physio but all I was thinkin about was going too the super market after and picking up some food so what do I do! I drove to the supermarket whicih is in da total opposite direction of the physio! hah its kinda funny but I was so annoyed and then I was like Im sure I can findn a different way to drive to physio so I tried but failed so had to drive all da way back to my house to go! what person only knows 1 route haha. then I was all emotional treated my physio therapist like a counsellor and he asked me if I had a bf and I was like NO! and he said y did u say it like that. I told him Im so emotional and a total mess and that I would never inflict myself on anyone! haha! I was tearing up da whole sessin. so on the way home went to the supermarket and lifted loadsa fruit! Ive totally put myself of grapes tho which is amazing for me bc last time I was home I could eat like 3-5 boxes in a day! ewww! I might have a box this wkd but wel c.
Im drinking green t with lemon every morning. pereh t after lunch and slim t after dinner. Today Ive had a kidney bean salad. mmm.it was well nice. Im gna work out now in a bit. Ive been doing this dvd sun power yoga for the last 2 days then body conditioning. I might walk to the supermarket and get sme melon and strawberries but Im not sure yet but thats a good 40 mins walk so its a gud idea.
Does anyone use this thingn called the speed shaper? I saw it in a magazine. It says u use it fr 7 mins a day. Id use it for at least 30 tho which cud possible have me ripped! o yeh! haha!
I wna hav sex sn! being a virgin is so not workin for me. In a way I just wna be so hot and untouchable to guys but on the other hand I just want sum1 to do me now! seriously. I wna go to river island now and just say to the hot guy u me changing rooms now haha! then he wud f course tink Im a slut when Im totally not. It really annoys me. ppl say Im hot and I no Im not ugly but I wna be hotter. the hottest. perfectin. ppl think Im like 16 when Im infact 22 bc I have a little girls body. I luv dat. especially in summer dresses I luk really young haha. but I wna be thinner thinner thinner. When I come back from england this wkd Im doing 30 days of bikram yoga! o yeh! have ne off u heard about it!
k so I walked down to tesco bought a watermelon and 2 litl packs of mango and diet 7up mmmmm!
40 min walk and an hour of conditioning. yeh! I woudl do more if I wasnt injured and meant to be takin it easy like. gna go practice my music now! luvage xx
Im drinking green t with lemon every morning. pereh t after lunch and slim t after dinner. Today Ive had a kidney bean salad. mmm.it was well nice. Im gna work out now in a bit. Ive been doing this dvd sun power yoga for the last 2 days then body conditioning. I might walk to the supermarket and get sme melon and strawberries but Im not sure yet but thats a good 40 mins walk so its a gud idea.
Does anyone use this thingn called the speed shaper? I saw it in a magazine. It says u use it fr 7 mins a day. Id use it for at least 30 tho which cud possible have me ripped! o yeh! haha!
I wna hav sex sn! being a virgin is so not workin for me. In a way I just wna be so hot and untouchable to guys but on the other hand I just want sum1 to do me now! seriously. I wna go to river island now and just say to the hot guy u me changing rooms now haha! then he wud f course tink Im a slut when Im totally not. It really annoys me. ppl say Im hot and I no Im not ugly but I wna be hotter. the hottest. perfectin. ppl think Im like 16 when Im infact 22 bc I have a little girls body. I luv dat. especially in summer dresses I luk really young haha. but I wna be thinner thinner thinner. When I come back from england this wkd Im doing 30 days of bikram yoga! o yeh! have ne off u heard about it!
k so I walked down to tesco bought a watermelon and 2 litl packs of mango and diet 7up mmmmm!
40 min walk and an hour of conditioning. yeh! I woudl do more if I wasnt injured and meant to be takin it easy like. gna go practice my music now! luvage xx
Wednesday, 8 July 2009
2 day posts!
lux like Im postin every 2 days now!
anyways more shit shit shit! Im sorry but it makes me happy! u do not well maybe u do understand what being constipated can do to a girls confidence! I feel heavey and bloated and like Im carrying a child! I actually haave managed to get my flat tummy back but when I am constipated I look possibly pregnant! and Im not exagerating!
so 2 days on taking my fibre capsules and hot water like theres no 2moro! Im drinking green t with lemon every morning, pereh t after lunch and slim t after dinnner! Ate a bit to much yday let myself go far to hungry and even when I did eat I just wnted more but it was all gud fruit and veg. altho da last 2 days I have had kidney beans whic def make me bloat but Im not gna have ne 2day bc of da amt I ate yday plus no seeds 2day either. gna have a salad for lunch den I have physio and gna go to shops after that and get some fruit. Ive been having mango and cherries again! but I think I want watermelon today! mmm luv dat stuff!
tinks with this boy have fizzled out its my fault! I act like Im way in2 some 1 like I rli wnt them and then I no they like me and then I start picking faults with them and say Im not really that into them! eek! its bad bc we hang in the same circle. o well!
I like a boy I saw workin in river island and I went back looking hot to flirt which Im actually quiete gud at but he wasnt wrkin ugh! I tink I just wnt to persue him bc Im a challenge!ppl tink Im actually a litl man eater but Im not bc Im a virgin but I like t get guys to want me and then I get afriad about them getting to no me and ditch them!
I think Im just gna have to have a 1 nite stand with sum hottie at this stage!
being doing lots of shoplifting lately! got me a whole new wardrobe! but have da fear still. my paretns left me money to buy food there gone away for a week and I spent it all on day 1! on new trainers and a dress! I am officially and most definetly a size 6 or 4 oon top possibly and still an 8 n my ass! grrr! I think thats da equivalent to a 2 and a 4 in america?! I dont no!
luv u guys hope every1s doing well! xxx
anyways more shit shit shit! Im sorry but it makes me happy! u do not well maybe u do understand what being constipated can do to a girls confidence! I feel heavey and bloated and like Im carrying a child! I actually haave managed to get my flat tummy back but when I am constipated I look possibly pregnant! and Im not exagerating!
so 2 days on taking my fibre capsules and hot water like theres no 2moro! Im drinking green t with lemon every morning, pereh t after lunch and slim t after dinnner! Ate a bit to much yday let myself go far to hungry and even when I did eat I just wnted more but it was all gud fruit and veg. altho da last 2 days I have had kidney beans whic def make me bloat but Im not gna have ne 2day bc of da amt I ate yday plus no seeds 2day either. gna have a salad for lunch den I have physio and gna go to shops after that and get some fruit. Ive been having mango and cherries again! but I think I want watermelon today! mmm luv dat stuff!
tinks with this boy have fizzled out its my fault! I act like Im way in2 some 1 like I rli wnt them and then I no they like me and then I start picking faults with them and say Im not really that into them! eek! its bad bc we hang in the same circle. o well!
I like a boy I saw workin in river island and I went back looking hot to flirt which Im actually quiete gud at but he wasnt wrkin ugh! I tink I just wnt to persue him bc Im a challenge!ppl tink Im actually a litl man eater but Im not bc Im a virgin but I like t get guys to want me and then I get afriad about them getting to no me and ditch them!
I think Im just gna have to have a 1 nite stand with sum hottie at this stage!
being doing lots of shoplifting lately! got me a whole new wardrobe! but have da fear still. my paretns left me money to buy food there gone away for a week and I spent it all on day 1! on new trainers and a dress! I am officially and most definetly a size 6 or 4 oon top possibly and still an 8 n my ass! grrr! I think thats da equivalent to a 2 and a 4 in america?! I dont no!
luv u guys hope every1s doing well! xxx
Sunday, 5 July 2009
the last 2/3 days!
yeh totally deflated! turned out I was pmsing! I got my period and den everything fell into place. 18 moviol, 16 fibre capsules and like 50 laxee teas later haha! I luv when I have my flat stomach I feel totally ripped and like I can do netin! friday and saturday were both very gud nites out! only ate fruit the last 2 days and then today I had fruit and veg!
n exercise 2day but watever! 2mros a new day! so so so tired from my fab social life! yeh I pood! its amazing how it can change ur life haha! x
n exercise 2day but watever! 2mros a new day! so so so tired from my fab social life! yeh I pood! its amazing how it can change ur life haha! x
Thursday, 2 July 2009
Deflate?
whats da best way to deflate in one day?! I need a bowel movement and to eat a litl sumtin as Im drinkin 2mro nite xx
movicol!
right 8 movicl later and Ive shifted some of the shit dat fills my by body. I worked at da sumemr camp gain today. My mom wanted to see me eat a banana b4 I left. I ate a necterine instead and didnt eat again till just there. little stir fry 1 table spoon of kidney beans. Im gna go check if ders ne watermelon now....yum. going shopping in an hr or so wna get me sum clothes for the wkd den going to the cinema with my cuz! da weather is shit rite now and is makin me feel like I have absolutly no energy :(
on da upside Im din my physio exercises on my foot and am hoping it is improving. Im seeing my physio again 2mro. going out 2mro and sat need my flat not constipated body back! xI feel fat x
on da upside Im din my physio exercises on my foot and am hoping it is improving. Im seeing my physio again 2mro. going out 2mro and sat need my flat not constipated body back! xI feel fat x
Wednesday, 1 July 2009
CONSTIPATED!
OMG! ever since I started restricting I develped IBS and have been dealing with constipation which is so bad! Right now I have 5 days of shit in my stomach! no joke u can c it all. My mom even said it. I have a little sorry big belly hanging out now bc Im so bunged up! Ive been doing everything. Laxatives, hot water! I dont no what to do. My mom wants me to try a supositree but I actually cant! bad child hood memories! Ive actually always been prone to constipation bc Im a little ball of stress.
Worked in the summer camp today. Had to eat an apple when I woke up first bc I thought I was gna die. also had 1 tblsp of linseed (help u poo apparently) and hot water then I ate a strawberry sum green beans and then at 6 after a walk where I thought I was gna faint I had a decent sized stiry fry with half a tin of kidney beans! Im having some pineapple later and then I am done for the day! Im also gna have 8 movicol for feacal impactment but they destroy my tummy! its a hard life having disordered eating, ibs and an injury and a fear of relationships! haha!
At da summer camp I was so lucky to avoid eating! bc they wnted to order a pizza so I hid in the changing rooms but den my bro who wrks der aswell was like come out and socialize! I was lukin a bit like a loner so I went out and thank god der was a mix up with the pizzas so dey tuk a lunch order so I ordered a sandwhich and hid it! haha I brought it home to give to my mom but den I realised shed no I didnt eat it! so its in my room. I wna give it to sum1 I hate wasting food!
2mro I will be fine bc Im doing da administration work so Ill be in an office alone! yeh! haha ne of guys have remedies for constipation.......?
pls x
Worked in the summer camp today. Had to eat an apple when I woke up first bc I thought I was gna die. also had 1 tblsp of linseed (help u poo apparently) and hot water then I ate a strawberry sum green beans and then at 6 after a walk where I thought I was gna faint I had a decent sized stiry fry with half a tin of kidney beans! Im having some pineapple later and then I am done for the day! Im also gna have 8 movicol for feacal impactment but they destroy my tummy! its a hard life having disordered eating, ibs and an injury and a fear of relationships! haha!
At da summer camp I was so lucky to avoid eating! bc they wnted to order a pizza so I hid in the changing rooms but den my bro who wrks der aswell was like come out and socialize! I was lukin a bit like a loner so I went out and thank god der was a mix up with the pizzas so dey tuk a lunch order so I ordered a sandwhich and hid it! haha I brought it home to give to my mom but den I realised shed no I didnt eat it! so its in my room. I wna give it to sum1 I hate wasting food!
2mro I will be fine bc Im doing da administration work so Ill be in an office alone! yeh! haha ne of guys have remedies for constipation.......?
pls x
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