Sunday, 17 May 2009

Day 1!

So today is my first day as an internet blogger and thank god for that! because everything Im going to write here is what goes on in my head on a daily basis and it just cannot be contained anymore! Its like the desire people have to always write lists. Shopping lists, To-Do lists....we just feel the urge to get them out of our head and onto some paper so that their there infront of us. real I guess.
So the deal with me is I usually write to my best friend because she understands the craziness of my ways and we laugh about it. A few years ago we embarked on some crazy internet diets together. Eating carrots only for days then just drinking milk. Crazy but effective! We watched as our bodies disappeared and my ribs and spine became prominent! I loved it! I kept up with the diet which was only meant to be for a week for almost a year! Marie dropped the diet! She loved her food way too much plus she could practically eat whatever she wanted anyway! Her body was amazing! So then I started getting comments from teachers and I loved it all! I felt amazing for having the will power to give up food! something that in my opinion people make way to big a deal over! and as for 2000 calories a day! dont get me started haha! So its safe to say I took the dieting too far which resulted in me getting IBS! ugh! and also a pretty messed up mind! and now Ive moved out of home and am living in a house with 5 other girls who constantly want to order take aways and indulge in Ben and Jerrys!
So this is gonna be my escape! My place to tell the truth and not make up ridiculous lies! Why is it so hard to be honest! and just say ok like I dont have an eating disorder because I do eat! Just a very limited, healthy diet! Why cant I just say this is my diet dont question it! It doesnt effect you! Am I making you stop eating! No! So why should it be a problem!
Anywho I dont want my first post to be too negative! haha but Ive just had surgery so I got in some weight watchers ready meals that wont be too much hassle to prepare hence the name! but still 300 calories for some vegetables and rice! I could prepare something way better and with half the fat content! So Ive decided to bin the ready meals and from today on I will be eating one muller light yoghurt a day! mmm....I tried to be a vegan but I could not give up these babies! plus I stopped getting my period and I kind wanted that back! well at least once in a while so I dont get osteoporosis! and maybe Im hoping it wont come to this but I have a safety packet of crackers which add up to 72 calories which I am considoring eating if I feel faint! usually I allow myself the luxury of indulging in unlimited amounts of fruit but I tend to go overboard on that and since I cant leave my house and I dont like anyone else buying my food I have to take the cracker route! and detox tea! So there we go! Thats the plan! I know it would be ideal for me to hop on a scales and take measurements to monitor this! but I never weight myself and digits freak me out! Although from being weighed for my pre-op I know that I am 7 stone 11 pounds! Almost 8 stone! ugh! so I think up to 11 pounds loss will be ideal! No more carbs! back on fresh fruit and veg! after my 3 day fast of course!
Ok Im gonna go and indulge in my blackcurrant fat free yoghurt! Already the binger in me was back! As soon as I stepped in the kitchen I was trying to work out a way to eat another yoghurt today and curious to see what other food was in my cuboard! O well Im safely locked in my room now and will not be in the kitchen again today!
well unless I feel the need for some crackers!

Ok Im already back! and have changed todays diet plan! So despite the surgery I did not wna eat a pack of crackers for the rest of the day and my knee was feelin ok so I braved a walk to tesco express so pick up some fruit! 3 boxes of grapes and 3 boxes of mango! So one of each each day for the next 3 days! there! I think thats better than having any carbs! woop woop! and Im gonna eat it all before 6 o clock! so Im on the water and green tea as of now!

xoxo Diet Lexy

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